16 Aug The Secret to Motivating Teenagers: How to Get Their Buy-In
Cornerstone Protection
836 Euclid Avenue Suite 16, Lexington
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Amazing assistance provided by Shannon today on my security system. I’m so grateful for your prompt, efficient, professional, and courteous service. Put me down as a customer for life!
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One of the most painless experiences I've had. They came on time and was over the moon professional with still keeping a level of personability to it. The gentleman also went out of his way to say that my husband and Mines business … More was appreciated. Which is actually rare to be appreciated by such a great company. So thank you and we look forward to continuing services with this company.
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I am so happy we decided to go with cornerstone. They were quick and efficient. Shannon and the installer we very friendly. We got a lot of equipment and it was still within our budget. 10/10 would definitely recommend! Thank you
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Love the customer service and Shanon and his team go above and beyond for my restaurant. Couldn't of asked for a better security system and level of service that his team provides.
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I have been using Cornerstone Protection service for over 5 years and I'm really happy with the service and state-of-the-art equipments and it's futures are so much in advance and friendly, I highly recommend Cornerstone Protection … More Service any and all business that need a security protection days and nights specially after business hours(Cornerstone Protection is perfect solution for your business). Owner of Cornerstone Protection is proactive with their customers and their equipments. Good experienced with Cornerstone Protection!!!
Kanu Patel -
We had a very positive experience with Alissa as a tutor for our pod of 5th grade boys from January - June 2020. She cared a lot about the boys and worked hard to create meaningful activities for them. The pod experience was invaluable … More for all of our families during a difficult year and we were so grateful to have found this partnership! We also want to appreciate Craig for helping to match us with a tutor on very short notice after we had cycled through a few folks who were not able to see the commitment through. Thanks for sticking with us!
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Dusty was the exact person we needed to help our child finish out the school year. So grateful to him for the way he steadily encouraged her and helped her stay on track and organized. He is flexible, responsive to our needs/schedule as … More a family, and a delight to be with. We are also thankful that Craig at Themba Tutors really "gets it" and partnered us with such a wonderful tutor who was a great fit for our girl.
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My child worked with Gillian D virtually for math enrichment. She is an excellent teacher. She took time to understand my child's specific learning style and provided tools that would be engaging. She was kind and empathetic- really … More made it her goal to connect with my child and build trust and rapport. My child started the school year with confidence and without the typically "brain-drain" that occurs over the summer, thanks to Gillian.
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I am going into my second year as a Themba tutor. I have met so many great individuals while working for this company. Craig and the rest of the Themba team do such an excellent job picking and choosing Themba tutors that suit each client's … More individual needs! I look forward to meeting new tutors and clients in the 2021-2022 school year!
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Our son started in a new high school, 100% remote, and was really struggling with Latin and Physics. I found Themba Tudors online and had an initial call with Craig, who was very knowledgeable, responsive, and found 2 amazing tutors for … More us. Both the Latin and the physics tutors were fantastic, connected with my son really well and helped him go from 'failing' grade to 'honors'! I will for sure continue using (and recommending!) Themba Tutors. Thank you, C, K, and W!
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Brian is a fantastic executive functioning coach. Super helpful, flexible with hours, and tailored the experience to our needs.
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Giulia Mercuri is a great Italian tutor! She was very responsive and accessible. Giulia put a ton of effort into preparing for each session and really helped our son with test preparation and projects. We are grateful that she was able … More to help, especially since our son did not receive any live teaching during COVID. We are happy that she was referred to us! -
As an adult student diagnosed with a learning disability during grad school, I knew I needed help dealing with my Master's program's demanding workload. I was seriously considering dropping out when I was referred to Themba Tutors. … More I was paired up with a wonderful tutor, Julie, who was a total lifesaver. I learned many techniques that I can utilize in the future as I embark on the next phase of my career.
I can wholeheartedly say after working with Themba for two years that I would not have finished my program without this organization. And I am so thankful I selected them. -
We were introduced to a wonderful tutor: Mcedwyn. He and our son, a freshman in college, worked well together. As a result, our son’s grades significantly improved. The tutor taught our son subject content and various methods to effectively … More study for quizzes and exams. Our son was also taught time management and organization. My son’s experience with the tutor made the first year of college a less intimidating experience. -
We have been with our tutor, Cailin Schiller, for two years, from 5th - 7th grade. She started as an executive functioning tutor with my daughter. From the start, she demonstrated a depth of expertise and a selective use of techniques skillfully … More adapted to my daughter’s ADHD and Math disability. Cailin made Math accessible and understandable to her in a way that even her teachers had not been able to do. She differentiated reading, writing and math tasks and assignments to tailor them to my daughter’s unique learning differences. Not only did it have an effect on her grades and her work efficiency, but she finally could do her work with less anxiety. Even my daughter’s teachers used Cailin’s guidance to modify their work with her. But most importantly, she became my daughter’s favorite resource. I can’t say how invaluable Cailin has been to my daughter’s progress and well-being. I’d recommend her a million times over. She is a gem. -
Victoria is a superb tutor. She helped my high school age daughter with her writing. Victoria's skills as a tutor, as well as her sense of humor and her engaging personality went a long way with my daughter. -
Themba Tutors provided a leaning specialist that was a perfect fit for my daughter. I told them what we were looking for and they delivered. Our tutor is responsive and flexible and makes it easy for my daughter to reach out to her own … More her own, which gives her an added sense of responsibility over her learning. As a therapist myself, I now regularly recommend Themba to my patients. A much needed and well provided service to the community!! -
The tutors at Themba are fantastic! Caitlyn McNeill helped our son academically, but also with getting organized in every subject, which he so desperately needed. She offered great advice and useful strategies that helped our son become … More a more successful student. We are using Themba tutors again this year for our daughter. We're so happy to have been referred to them! -
I'm so glad we were referred to Themba Tutors. After a great initial conversation to learn our needs, we were connected with an excellent tutor, Felicia, who is helping our high school daughter learn better organizational and executive … More skills. Highly recommended. -
We had a wonderful experience with our tutor Micaela. She helped our son not only academically but at every level. We will be forever grateful to have her in our lives. -
The tutors at Themba are fantastic! Caitlyn McNeill helped our son academically, but also with getting organized in every subject, which he so desperately needed. She offered great advice and useful strategies that helped our son become … More a more successful student. We are using Themba tutors again this year for our daughter. We're so happy to have been referred to them!
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Paul Smith at Themba has been an exceptional tutor for my son, both in terms of teaching the subject matter and teaching how best to approach the process of learning math and executing assignments. We feel very fortunate to be working with … More Paul. -
We were very lucky to have found Edwouine Swift, my son's therapist through Themba Tutors. Thomas is 12 years old, and it is extremely difficult to get him to write. Edwouine just works her magic with him, he adores her and is so … More eager to follow her guidance. I have no doubt she will be a positive driving force in his academic future.
THE SECRET TO MOTIVATING TEENAGERS:
HOW TO GET THEIR BUY-IN
You’ve been there. The daily battle of trying to motivate your teen to do their chores, homework, or whatever you need them to do. It’s frustrating and exhausting. No matter what you try, they just don’t seem to care. But what if I told you the secret to unlocking your teen’s motivation has been right before you this whole time?
The key is buy-in. Getting your teen to buy into why something needs to get done is the single most effective way to motivate them for the long haul. When they understand why a task or responsibility is important, they will be much more willing to do it without constant nagging and reminders from you. The challenge is getting them to that point of understanding and agreement. But with the right approach, you can get your teen’s buy-in and cooperation.
Keep reading to discover the three keys to gaining your teen’s buy-in so you can motivate them in a way that lasts. Your sanity will thank you.
THE SECRET TO MOTIVATING TEENAGERS
Understand Their Motivations: What Do Teenagers Really Want?
Teenagers want independence, trust, and respect. If you want them to buy into your rules or requests, you must understand what motivates them.
Give them more freedom and control. Teens crave independence, so allow them to make more of their own choices when possible. Let them pick out their own clothes, decide on activities, or set their own curfew (within reason). Feeling like they have some say will make them more willing to cooperate in other areas.
Build trust through honesty and fairness. Explain your reasoning behind the rules and be open to listening to their perspective. Treat your teen with fairness and respect. They’ll be more inclined to trust your judgment when they feel heard and respected.
Appeal to their sense of responsibility. Teens want to be treated like young adults, giving them opportunities to show maturity. Ask them to babysit, do chores, or run errands. Praise them when they follow through. Making them feel responsible and capable will motivate them to step up.
Understanding what motivates teenagers is key. Give them space to spread their wings, be honest and fair, and provide chances for responsibility. With the right approach, you will gain their buy-in and cooperation. After all, raising teens is a balancing act, but focus on trust and mutual respect, and you will both thrive.
Build Trust and Connection: Why It Matters More Than You Think
You can’t force teens to change their behavior, but you can influence them. The secret is gaining their trust and building an authentic connection.
Why is this so important? Teenagers crave independence yet still need guidance. They may act like they don’t care what you think, but they do – especially if they respect you. The more you strengthen your bond, the more they value your input.
So how do you do this?
- Listen without judgment. Create opportunities for them to open up to you about both big and small things going on in their lives. Listen to understand rather than just reply.
- Share some of your life too. Let them see you as a real person. Talk about your experiences as a teen and the lessons you have learned. Keep it real.
- Express interest in the things they care about. Attend sports games, plays, or other events. Ask them questions about their hobbies, friends, and activities. Your support means the world.
- Have fun together. Do interactive things together, like playing board games, cooking a meal, and going on a hike. Laughter is bonding.
- Be flexible and give them space when they need it. While staying involved in their lives also gives them privacy and independence. It is a balancing act.
If you make an effort to connect truly, your teen will be much more open to hearing your guidance. And that is how you gain their buy-in. Focus on the relationship, and the rest will follow.
Empower Them With Choice: How to Make Teenagers Feel in Control
To get your teen’s buy-in, give them opportunities to make their own choices. Teenagers crave independence and control over their lives, so offering them options whenever possible will make them feel empowered and more motivated to cooperate.
Give Them Options
Present your teen with 2-3 options for accomplishing what needs to get done. For example, instead of telling them they have to clean their room right now, ask if they’d rather clean it tonight after dinner or this weekend. The choice is still cleaning the room, but they get to decide when. This makes them feel more in control of the situation.
Let your teen make decisions when the options don’t matter to you. Do they want to do their homework before or after they walk the dog? Do they want to invite friends over to study on Tuesday or Thursday? Giving them autonomy over minor details shows you respect their ability to make their own choices. At the same time, be consistent and follow through to make sure the important things still get done according to your values and household rules.
Compromise When You Can
Teenagers often push back against rules and limits simply because they want more independence. Look for opportunities to find common ground and negotiate compromises. Be willing to listen to their perspective with an open mind. Extending a curfew by 30 minutes in exchange for checking in by text can give them more freedom while still maintaining your standards.
Compromise and collaboration will lead to less resentment and more motivation to cooperate in the long run.
We have to empower our teens. Giving them choices and compromising when we can. This will strengthen our connection with them and will motivate them to be responsible and be a young independent adult.
Helping our kids with the right balance of control while offering them reasonable options to help them feel and understand that they have responsibilities is the key to developing their control and independence.
Conclusion
So there you have it, the keys to unlocking teen motivation and getting their buy-in. Focus on their interests, give them autonomy and a voice, set clear expectations, and make it rewarding. If you build relevance and value into their actions, they’ll be much more willing to work for it. Remember, these strategies aren’t a silver bullet.
Motivating teens still takes time, effort, and patience. But if you apply these principles consistently, you will find that they do help. That apathetic teen may start coming around and putting in more effort. Moreover, the best part is that these motivation techniques will serve them well beyond their teen years. So do your teen (and yourself) a favor – give these tips a try. You have got nothing to lose and an engaged, motivated teen to gain.
Craig Selinger
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